I was at a small family party during COVID. Only our bubble was allowed. My husband was away working in Johannesburg, so I was there alone with a bunch of couples and older people. I felt out of place from the start.

The wine hit me hard. Music was loud, bass going through my whole body. I knew I should slow down, but I didn’t. He was thousands of kilometres away and the night felt too good to sit quiet.

Then there was the hosts’ son, our neighbour’s son, actually, a distant nephew in his mid to late twenties. He was doing his master’s degree, and because we owned a small printing business he’d been coming to our place many times for bulk printing of assignments, papers, and thesis drafts. He was hot and well built, sharp looking with a model face, the kind of solid frame that filled out a t-shirt without trying. That night he stared at me the whole time like he already owned me. Heavy predatory eyes.

Everyone else was busy with the pool or some loud movie. I was standing there bored with my glass when he slid in next to me, knee against mine. You look like you’d rather be somewhere else, he said low. I laughed, too tipsy to care. He leaned in close, lips almost on my ear.

Want to give me company outside ? Just for a smoke. I don’t smoke. I still followed him out onto the deck. Night swallowed us. I should have said no. The wine made me reckless and the brush of his fingers on my wrist shot straight between my legs.

The door closed and his hands were around my waist right away, pulling me in rough, no games. His mouth crashed onto mine, tongue pushing in hard. I should have pushed him off. Instead my body arched into him. Soft sounds came out of me that I couldn’t stop.

Fuck, you taste good, he growled. Fingers shoved my thong aside and pushed straight into me. No hesitation. I gasped, hips jerking. My mind was screaming no but my cunt clenched tight around his fingers. Stop ! we can’t, I tried but my words turned into a moan when he curled them just right.

Let’s go to the sunroom, he said, licking his fingers clean. I should have run but I followed him. Inside the sunroom he pushed me onto the couch. Skirt yanked open. Tshirt pushed up, bra undone. Mouth on my neck, then sucking hard on my nipple until I cried out. Cool air on my skin, then his hot mouth.

Someone will see, I panted, even while I lifted my hips so he could strip my thong off. They’re busy, no one comes to the Sun room anymore he muttered between my thighs, I could confirm from the musty smell of the couch. Then his mouth was on me. Tongue fucking deep into me while his fingers played with my clit. I spread my legs wider, grabbed his hair, and ground against his face like a slut. I was dripping.

You’re soaked for me, he groaned, lapping it up. Gonna fuck you so deep you’ll forget your own name. This is wrong, I thought. But when he rose up and I felt his hard cock press against my wet entrance, all I did was whimper.

He shoved into me in one brutal thrust. Full length, deep, no mercy. My nails dug into his shoulders. He fucked me hard and fast, each snap of his hips dragging broken moans out of me. The couch creaked. My body took every thrust.

That’s it, take it, he growled, teeth in my neck. You love this. Yes ! I did. God, I did.

Pleasure and guilt mixed until I couldn’t tell them apart. When he came he grabbed my mouth and groaned in my mouth and pumped me full. My cunt clenched and milked every drop out of him.

Then it was over. He pulled out, tucked himself away, and left me lying there dazed, thighs sticky with his cum and my own wetness. I fixed my skirt and bra. I walked back inside like nothing happened. It was 1 a.m. The house was still loud with music. My mouth still tasted like him. Legs still shaking. Cum slowly leaking through my silk panty down my thighs.

As I entered the main room where everyone was still busy, he was at the dining table eating a sandwich. Hey, he said out loud. Where were you? Did you fall asleep on the couch?

His mother called from the kitchen, "Do you need a sandwich Ash dear?

Rage hit me, at him, at myself, at the slick mess still between my legs. Under the rage was something worse. Need. I already knew I’d let him fuck me again.